Friday

Quick laugh

Teacher : History is a very interesting subject. It tells youabout what had happened in the past. Student : Please teacher, I don't think I want to study history. Teacher : Why? Student : There is no future in it ............. ......... ......... ......... ......... ......... ......... . Teacher : Ted, if your father has $10 and you ask him for $6,how much would your father still have? Ted : $10. Teacher : You don't know maths. Ted : You don't know my father! ............ ......... ......... ......... ......... ......... ......... ........ Mother : David, come here. David : Yes, mum? Mother : You really disappoint me. Your results are getting worse. David : But I will only get my report book tomorrow. Mother : I know that. But I am going to Hong Kong tomorrow, so I am scolding you now. ............ ......... ......... ......... ......... ......... ......... ........ Father : Why did you fail your mathematics test? Son : On Monday, teacher said 3+5=8 Father : So? Son : On Tuesday, she said 4+4=8 And on Wednesday, she said 6+2=8. If she can't make up her mind, how do I know the right answer? ............ ......... ......... ......... ......... ........ ....... ........ A mother and son were doing dishes while the father and daughter were watching TV in the living room. Suddenly, there was a loud crash of breaking plates, then complete silence. The daughter turned to look at her father. Daughter : It's mummy! Father : How do you know? Daughter : She didn't say anything ............. ......... ......... ......... ......... ......... Girl: Do you love me? Boy: Yes Dear Girl: Would you die for me? Boy: No, mine is undying love ------------ --------- --------- --------- --------- -- Man: How old is your father? Boy: As old as me Man: How can that be? Boy: He became a father only when I was born ------------ --------- --------- --------- --------- -- Waiter: I've stewed liver, boiled tongue and frog's leg. Customer: Don't tell me your problems. Give me the menu card. ------------ --------- --------- --------- --- Teacher : Simon, your composition on "My Dog" is exactly the same as your brother's. Did u copy his? Simon : No, teacher, it's the same dog! ------------ --------- --------- --------- --------- -- Father : Your teacher says she finds it impossible to teach you anything! Son : That's why I say she's no good! ------------ --------- --------- --------- --------- -- Teacher: "Where were u born?" Student: " Singapore , Sir." Teacher: "Which part?" Student: "All of me, Sir." ------------ --------- --------- --------- --------- ---- A teacher was asking her class: "What is the difference between 'unlawful' and 'illegal'?" Only one hand shot up. "Ok, answer, Joan"said the teacher. "'unlawful' is when u do something the law doesn'tallow and 'illegal' is a sick eagle." ------------ --------- --------- --------- --------- --- Teacher: "How come you do not comb your hair?" Ah Kow: "No comb, Sir." Teacher: "Use your dad's then." Ah Kow: "No hair, Sir." ------------ --------- --------- --------- --------- ----A boy came home from school with his exam results. "What did u get?" asked his father. "My marks are under water," said the boy. "What do u mean 'under water'?" "They are all below 'C' (sea) level"

1 comment:

rieyza said...

hahaha..did u get all this jokes collection?so funny lew..